Poisoned
Argh. I've been hit by MSG poisoning. Symptoms: feeling of constriction around the chest and soreness of the arm muscles, difficulty breathing, back of neck felt hot. Argh. Not comfortable, especially when I'm trying to drive safely at night! Argh, I hate driving at night, poor visibility, the feeling that I'm going to be hit from behind when I change lanes cos I failed to see someone, or someone switched suddenly into my lane. Do people drive worse at night? Feels like it. Anyway, blargh. I feel ambushed by this MSG thing, I've only had it so bad once before, when I ate assam steamed fish at a cze cha stall with my mum, we both got it, but I think she only felt the hot flush at the neck, whereas I got that constricted feeling like I'm having a heart attack or something (touch wood). If I remember from bio psychology, apparently MSG overdose causes that cos it mimics glutamate, a neurotransmitter in the body, causing neurons to fire wildly or something. Bleah. Yeah, the bad thing is that you never know which crazy stall uses tons of MSG. All I had was fish slice bee hoon soup, and I didn't even eat most of it cos of my sore gums. The soup must have been loaded with the white stuff. Sneaky!
I am the less wiser by a tooth
Taking out a wisdom tooth is horrible, painful and incapacitating... unless you don't mind returning to work/school with a Big Mac face. Oh, and no solid food for a while either. Sigh. Anyway, I did it on Tuesday, it's now Sat and I look like a normal human being already. Heh. Still a little swollen but manageable. And I have to nibble at food and chew only on my right side so as not to stress the wound. This will do wonders for my figure!
Buttons
After I reacted in childish, unpleasant displeasure to something recently, my mum commented to me that I have to grow up. Specifically, that I learn not to react when people push my buttons, even if they are really close to me, cos that would give them too much power, and I'll never be able to be fully in control of my life. Certainly it's something I've heard before, "don't let people push your buttons", but not anything that I thought would apply to my own life. But, coming as it does in the context of recent weeks' discussions on moving out, being independent vs being dependent, vs interdependence (as in staying at home cos you need your family but conversely your family also benefits from your unique presence) the comment has made me wonder whether I've still got a ways to go. This is a fundamental thing - I haven't grown up, not because I don't live on my own, but because in many situations I let circumstances or other people dictate what's going to happen. It can be anything from what time we leave the house, to how often I eat, to when I get angry. Recently my anger has been a defense mechanism - I get angry to avoid loss of control, to avoid hurt - but am I the real loser when I get angry? As Yoda wisely said, "Fear leads to anger; anger leads to hate; hate... leads to suffering." Yes there are times to put my foot down, times I should get angry, at other people, at myself; but when I get angry, sometimes the wrong people suffer.
Mean Girls
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Originally uploaded by Phuazzie.
Pai Kiah and Kid Sister
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Originally uploaded by Phuazzie.
Meena & Pai Kiah
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Originally uploaded by Phuazzie.This could have been our past-future in another timewarp.
Flowers for 200E
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Originally uploaded by Phuazzie.
Goodbye...
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Originally uploaded by Phuazzie.Goodbye to a faithful companion, the first car I ever drove.
V for Vendetta
V for Vendetta
Originally uploaded by Phuazzie.I recently bought V for Vendetta by Alan Moore from Comics Mart, Serene Centre. They surprise me. I've been going to that shop for donkey's years and every year it looks the same, just that one year they started importing magazines in addition to comics, and the new comics shelf is always changing place. Other than that, the Warcraft figurines are still there, the Sandman mural is still up and the shelves are still cheap and white. But somehow, they have expanded without changing... now they have 2 more outlets in different parts of Singapore, and I found out that they're the suppliers for National Library's comics! Wow, talk about a big contract. So, go Comics Mart!
Anyway, yes. My purchase was probably catalyzed by the movie coming out soon, starring Natalie Portman, but in my defense I was into comics long before this. I've even read Watchmen! So yeah, this is hit 2 on the must-read Alan Moore list.
That got me thinking about the whole concept of 'must-read', 'must-see', or 'must-do'. Often you think that it's so overhyped. Many a summer blockbuster is hyped as the must-see of the year, but even if you do see it, your brain cells remain the same in number. Heck, you might even have killed off a few precious neurons in the 2 hours of low light, low oxygen, low blink rates, and high salt and butter intake. But looking back, I can agree that a certain HK serial I watched was a 'must-watch', certain places were a 'must-see', and many books were a 'must-read'. Because they have changed my life. And I feel better having done them.
Since the internet always welcomes a list, here's my short list of 'musts' that I have read, seen, done or watched. Short because I'm sure I can't think of all of them at one sitting. Feel free to contribute!
Must-see
- Phantom of the Opera
- Star Wars (III, IV, V, VI)
- Sunset Boulevard
- Wong Kar Wai's Happy Together
- Chungking Express
- BBC's Pride and Prejudice (Jennifer Ehle & the infamous Colin Firth)
- The Door in the Floor (adaptation of John Irving's 'A Widow for One Year', starring Kim Basinger and Jeff Bridges. Low-hyped but surprisingly good and a strangely original plotline)
- Lord of the Rings Trilogy
- Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
- The Truman Show
- The Cider House Rules
- etc
Must-Read
- Macbeth
- Buddha of Suburbia by Hanif Kureishi
- Brighton Rock by Graham Greene
- The Importance of Being Earnest
- Of Mice and Men
- Poetry in Sec 3
- Watchmen
- the Sandman
- X-Men comics (from the 80's and early 90's)
- Mary Poppins
- Enid Blyton (it's a developmental milestone!)
- Harry Potter (I anticipate flak)
- Hamlet
- the Bible!
Alright, this list is really short. I think I've watched so many movies that I can't think of all of them right now. Ditto for books. Anyway.
Memoirs Of A Geisha
Memoirs Of A Geisha
Originally uploaded by Phuazzie.I hope this doesn't fall into the category of "movies I hope will be good but turn out crap". The feature article in Time magazine made a good point, that Memoirs isn't going to be an attempt to capture a historical moment in Japan; better to approach it as a drama, a fantasy. There's an ineffable sense that outsiders would never be able to capture what is true or real about a time, a culture, a practice, especially one so loaded and mysterious that of the geishas. Like, I liked "Lost in Translation" but it doesn't tell you much about the Japanese. But Memoirs is irritatingly outsider - it's directed by an American musical director (recently of Chicago fame) and the 3 leads are all ethnic Chinese. Well, we'll see.
Anyway, Zhang Ziyi is playing the lead, Sayuri if I'm not wrong. It's a classic Cinderella story. Michelle Yeoh plays her mentor-geisha, while Gong Li is the smouldering, jealous arch-rival. Wah. I think Maggie Cheung would have fit the mentor-role better, but Michelle Yeoh is beautiful too. The one thing that irritates me about Asian movies recently that are made by Westerners is how the Asian girls keep flicking around unbound, long black hair (cf: Fann Wong in Shanghai Knights and Ziyi in Memoirs). Cos, like, in Asian culture, to flick around unbound, long black hair means you've gone mad.
So I was teased for being a mummy's girl
Had dinner on Mon night with Maryam and Steph. Steph has just moved into a flat at Toa Payoh with a friend so she doesn't have to travel so far to work. And Maryam has been pretty much staying on her own in Singapore since JC. Which led both of them to tease me for being a "mummy's girl" (isn't it usually daddy's girl??) cos I was the only one present who still stays at home. What to do, creature and relational comforts are good. Anyway, I'm open to new experiences and branching out and stuff.. can't stay sheltered forever! *inward shudder at the un-coolness of the statement*
But hey-hey, I'm the first to see Steph's new digs! We spent quite some time trying to lock her louver (louvre??) windows shut so that people passing by in the corridor won't be able to reach through and touch her hair while she's sleeping (a shuddersome possibility that just happened to come to mind, because they can't unlock anything or come into the flat since there's a grill on the window). So the two of us were at it, and Steph's roommate came home and helped, and finally Steph achieved lockedness! Very retro experience, brings back memories of my old house. Hee!
Anyway, it's just so great hanging out with them, so at least I can feel connected to the past. I get weird comments sometimes, like "You're so demure now!" (Nat, from Hwa Chong) or "You're the Elaine Phua?? But you're so quiet and sweet in class!" (NUS guy and erstwhile ACS GEP-er who seems to know about me and all my friends though I didn't know him from Adam. He's my friend now so he won't mind me saying this right?? Hahahhahahahha) So, er, yeah. Me, quiet and sweet????????? Like since when???? Sigh, the power of the situation. It's like, you do need a solid surrounding of friends who've known you for a while and won't speak behind your back before you can really let loose and be crazy. And I wasn't crazy in a psychotic, "What's wrong with you??" sense, but I like to think I was (am!) fun and never boring. I was whining to Andrew one day, "What if I grow up and become an adult and work everyday and I'm totally boring?" and he said, "You'll never be boring!" Wow, what an affirmation! So hmph to the guys-at-the-comic shop, who thought I was taking something boring and not cool like psychology, implying that I'm boring!
It's a bit scary to think that so many of my most outstanding and defining memories (and true, cool friends) come from the days I spent in RGS (like will I ever have such a awesome time in my life ever again?) but the important thing is that I did experience them! And I'm so much the better for it. Yeah!
Reading List
I know, I have an exam next Monday, but I went on a borrowing spree recently at the well-stocked NUS library and borrowed these books:
- Kazuo Ishiguro,
When We Were Orphans- Elizabeth Bowen,
The Death of the Heart- Haruki Murakami,
South of the Border, West of the Sun- Henry James,
The Wings of the DoveSuitably impressive? Ah, I foresee the expansion of my intellectual and emotional horizons, as well as the growth of new neuronal connections.
Jolie's Lips Are Redder Than the Sun
Recently I watched Beyond Borders. It's one of the most pointless movies ever and I wonder which producer supported it being made in the first place. Not even Angelina Jolie and Clive Owen could save it from meandering crap-ness.
**spoilers**Basically, Clive Owen plays a guerilla doctor-without-borders, as in he's a one-man act, healing and feeding the sick and dying in developing nations while terrorising international non-governmental organizations who ignore the needs of those he represents. Angelina Jolie sees one of his righteous outbursts and her knees melt basically. While her marriage crumbles (which is defined in two scenes, one of the two of them arguing, and one of her finding the hubby at home in the middle of a workday, sitting on the sofa with another woman, she flits off to help him save the world and all that jazz. But finally, he sells himself out to the CIA to get his refugee camp funded and gets kidnapped by big bad guys in Chechnya (from Ethiopia to Chechnya?? what the...) and Angelina flies there to save the day! There are a lot of almost-Lara Croft moments where she tells him to Get up! and move out and all that, but finally she sacrifices her life for him. But it's not really a sacrifice - she steps on a landmine and explodes herself before he can reach her and die as well.
**end spoilers** Grr. It doesn't succeed either as a romance or a drama. Also, the scenes in Ethiopia, Cambodia and Chechnya are one-dimensional and serve only to justify the notion that "it's the same crap everywhere". The one good thing about the show is that it does highlight the invisible plight of millions in poverty-stricken or war-torn nations. Many of us feel powerless in the face of overwhelming statistics such as the number of children dying every minute from preventable diseases such as cholera and measles, but we can and should make a difference, one cent at a time. I'm going to find out how in the next couple of weeks, and keep it posted on this blog. Heh.
By the way, I hate husband stealers. Of any kind.
How You Live Your Life
| How You Life Your Life |
You seem to be straight forward, but you keep a lot inside.
You're laid back and chill, but sometimes you care too much about what others think.
You prefer a variety of friends and tend to change friends quickly.
You tend to dream big, but you worry that your dreams aren't attainable. |
Pretty accurate, except that I do try to hold onto the closer friendships.
The Keys to Your Heart
| The Keys to Your Heart |
 You are attracted to those who are unbridled, untrammeled, and free.
In love, you feel the most alive when your partner is patient and never willing to give up on you.
You'd like to your lover to think you are loyal and faithful... that you'll never change.
You would be forced to break up with someone who was ruthless, cold-blooded, and sarcastic.
Your ideal relationship is comforting. You crave a relationship where you always feel warmth and love.
Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment.
You think of marriage as something precious. You'll treasure marriage and treat it as sacred.
In this moment, you think of love as something you can get or discard anytime. You're feeling self centered. |
What Are The Keys To Your Heart?
