As Time Goes By
I watched Wait Til You're Older at the Singapore Island Country Club today with my parents and my brother. A short plot synopsis: Kwong is an unhappy child whose mother committed suicide 3 years ago. Soon after, his father married an evil stepmother (Karen Mok). Kwong hates his life and can't wait for the day when he saves up enough money to leave home for good. One day, he meets a quirky old man with a potion that accelerates the natural aging process. Kwong steals some, and matures overnight into... Andy Lau! Right, you might be thinking, another
Big type fantasy. However, the movie was not nearly that escapist. There are a few fish-out-of-water or grown-up-fantasy joke set pieces, but overall the theme that the movie powerfully conveyed is that everyone makes mistakes, and you can't ever go back into the past to change it, because time marches inexorably on. Because Andy Lau overdosed on the potion, he ages 20 years overnight, and by the 4th day, he looks like a decrepit, 80 year old man. He's learned a lot in those 4 days, and he wants to go back to where he was, to be a good son to his father and stepmother, but he can't. Time moves on, and it can't be magicked away. Such a true thing, yet very few people really live each moment for all its worth, and too many look back to their past mistakes, past pleasures, past glories (secondary school reminisces anyone???) without looking forward to the hope of creating an even better future. I'm guilty of that as well. Some of my most painful moments come when I think how good things were back *insert appropriate year*, or when I think about what could have been different if I'd just chosen differently xxx years ago. But the past is really past. Nothing I do now can change what I did then. But what I do now, and what I think now, can change the person I'll be in the future. It's so hard to write about this without being maudlin. But the fact is I'm still having a hard time letting go of the past, especially the good memories. And like Kwong, the naughty boy, I regret the bad things I have done and wish I could turn back time so I could have a second chance to avoid them. But the message of the movie isn't to avoid mistakes, because the very idea is laughably impossible. As my dad summarized, the lesson of the movie is - if you make a mistake, don't make the further mistake of wasting even more time avoiding the consequences, or regretting the mistake. Quickly rectify it and make it better. Because there's little that's more tragic than wasting the minutes and hours that make up a life.
News
I frogged (knitting parlance for mercilessly unraveling your knitted work to the yarn from which it was born - "rip it, rip it", geddit??) my lovely plummy-blue scarf. Argh. It is know 15 rows of stitches. A rectangle?? Argh. What does that say about my life?
Who wants to get high on cough syrup?
After 3 days of thinking I don't need to drink codeine-laced cough linctus (linctus, from contextual clues, refers to a sticky, syrupy liquid with a cloying taste. Brrrghhhh), I had to cry uncle last night. Yesterday was the horriblest day ever, I was hacking and coughing every 20minutes, which leads to wheezing, which leads to not enjoying myself even on a night out courtesy of my supervisor, save for a calm moment (after another blasted round of rain) at Siem Reap, Asian Civilizations Museum, listening to romantic, lightly swinging, downbeat vocal jazz. Ahhh. Went home and took two spoonfuls of cough linctus, one tablet of drowsy-inducing anti-histamine and plonked right into bed. Debated with myself over whether to come to school this morning, then my conscience (plus the memory of undone tasks) won. I'm in school now! Haha. Should stop blogging then.
On a high note, I heard Moon River live!!!!!!! The Indochine jazz singer is a lovely lady with a mature, low, velvety voice; her rendition was a little faster than what you normally hear, but it was really really lovely. Ah. The cherry on the chocolate cake was when she sang Cheek to Cheek at the end of the set. Whee!
Weeeird Day
Yesterday I had a really good, productive day, followed by today: a lousy day where everything went wrong. My experiment participants suddenly don't want to participate anymore, the participants who do come make strange mistakes, rendering their data unusuable, my friend's mother falls ill, making my friend sick with worry, I miss your class because of experiments gone wrong, and to top it off I forget to bring my already-overdue DVD's to return to Video Ezy. Then just as suddenly, the day turns out right, when I go out for prata supper with 3 good friends from NUS, followed by a relaxing shared tub of Ben&Jerry's Chocolate Fudge Brownie ice cream on my patio with Lulu for company, followed by a spur-of-the-moment, oh so fun trip for MORE Ben&Jerry's at the Night Safari! Sudden brain wave - the unlikeliest yet most logical place to go for ice cream in Singapore, at the middle of the night, on a weeknight (NYDC is open late on weekends!). Night Safari at 12am is a magical experience. The ice cream was yummy, the company hilarious, and the toilets astounding (trigger-happy me took pictures!) To top it off, there was an array of stunning, nearly-life size lanterns in the shape of elephants, tigers and giraffes. Pictures are coming!
And then, suddenly, at 2.30am, a phone call from a private number that chills me to the bone, because I have no idea who the person is, and he or she sounds... how should I put it... crazy.
I'm still awake. God protect me!
Winding Road
Well, it's been 1 year and 6 months (or so) since I've started this blog. Much has changed in my life and this blog is starting to feel a little... stale. Well, no plans to move/start over/revamp/trash everything as yet. But stay tuned ;)
I Carry Your Heart With Me - e. e. cummings
i carry your heart with me(i carry it in
my heart)i am never without it(anywhere
i go you go,my dear;and whatever is done
by only me is your doing,my darling)
i fear
no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want
no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you
here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows
higher than soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart
i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Who would have thought to hear this beautiful poem in a chick flick?
Well, in one of the most touching scenes I've ever seen, Cameron D
reads out this poem to her sis, played by Toni Collette, after a
rollicking ride in which they have a bitter fallout, and then a
bittersweet reunion, after fully understanding just how much they have
shaped each others' lives, and how much they want to continue being a
part of the other's life. I appreciate the movie (and the novel by
Jennifer Weiner) for honestly dealing with these themes. OK, so some
parts of the movie are pretty stilted, the guys are dorky, some lines
are lame, but the overall message is valuable and beautiful ;)
And Cameron D can read poetry! Who would've thunk it?
Sun!
Finally, a sunny day!! And hardly a dark cloud in sight!!! *fingers
crossed* Finally, the clothes can dry, and my bath towel will no
longer smell like... wet towel, and my dogs will no longer smell
like... wet dogs. Ew. And they're getting a bath today (courtesy of my
long-suffering maid) and they'll have the sun to dry off in!!! God is
good =)
Time Encapsulated
Blues
Originally uploaded by Phuazzie.This scarf represents the time I spent today waiting for something to happen, or finish happening. On the bus, on the way to school, at NUH, waiting for a brain scan to complete, on the MRT, on the way home. Wow. I waste a lot of time every day! In a way that's the nice thing about knitting. It occupies your hands, freeing up your mind to think thoughts, and you have something palpable and pretty-colored to show at the end of that in-between time (unlike the ephemeral result of levels gained and brain cells expended after hours of playing on the gameboy)!
Sugar Plum Fairy
Sugar Plum Fairy
Originally uploaded by Phuazzie.This ball of yarn was dyed by Anlin and generously given to me to make my first knitting project! Whee! Hope I can do the lovely colors justice. The colors come out a bit weird on my camera phone, shall try to take a pic with my digicam soon!
Canst Thou Believe I Made This?
Scarf in the Making
Originally uploaded by Phuazzie.Presenting... skinny scarf in the making! With baby blue ends and a sugar plum (blend of russet blue and plum) body.
Knitty Tribute to Macbeth
Knitty
Originally uploaded by Phuazzie.Is this a knitting needle which I see before me,
The handle toward my hand? Come, let me clutch thee.
I have thee not, and yet I see thee still.
Art thou not, fatal vision, sensible
To feeling as to sight? or art thou but
A dagger of the mind, a false creation,
Proceeding from the heat-oppressed brain?
I see thee yet, in form as palpable
As this which now I draw.
Thou marshall'st me the way that I was going;
And such an instrument I was to use.
Mine eyes are made the fools o' the other senses,
Or else worth all the rest
Xmas 2 - Normal Perspective
Xmas 2 - Normal Perspective
Originally uploaded by Phuazzie.Normal perspective. The pic behind us looks vaguely obscene. Please keep in mind that the ambiguous curve is the model's ELBOW!
Xmas 1 - Gandalf and Frodo
Gandalf and Frodo
Originally uploaded by Phuazzie.Through some weird distortion of perspective, Andrew looks huge and I look like a dwarf. This was taken Christmas afternoon, where the two of us, with our colors combined... made Christmas!!
Sunday
I was completely astonished at the sheer volume of rain that poured
down over Singapore yesterday. From 2.30am on Saturday night/Sunday
morning, when I finally slept, till I woke up at 9.30am, through the
whole morning, and afternoon, until 11pm, it kept raining and raining,
not a drizzle, but a steady downpour significantly wet-inducing and
puddle-forming to make driving a hazard and walking a soggy affair. I
was put-out by the weather cos I'd been looking forward to my Sunday
swim, but my day wasn't a wash. Indeed, it turned out to be a very
good day, in spite of, and to some degree because of the weather. No I
didn't get to swim, but I did run on the treadmill, have breakfast
with my mum and brother, lunch and shopping with Serene, Pan Liang and
Yun Jie, dinner at home, and finally Star Wars Episode III - Revenge
of the Sith on DVD in my living room with Maryam, Steph and Kaarsten.
Whee! In a way it's a good thing I didn't go swimming, cos I got to
spend more time with people at Bishan, eating, shopping and eating
some more (ice cream overload - result: sore throat today). And it was
also fun walking through puddles and sloshing up water (I wore cheery
pink flip-flops that dried quickly and did not squish; joy!). And I
didn't leave my umbrella at Junction 8! (well I almost did, but I
remembered in time and Pan Liang and Yun Jie gallantly returned to
Sakae Sushi to retrieve it for me, while Serene and I ordered ice
cream). Yup, it was a cool, wet, friend-filled day. Just what I needed
;)
I have fabulous friends
I have a friend who's been dolled-up, made over and full-out
interviewed
and featured in People Magazine (that's right, People magazine
USA!!) for losing weight in (gasp!) a sensible, disciplined fashion,
including low-fat, high fibre meals (that she largely prepares
herself, no shortcuts there!) and exercising (not just exercising but
running! She's got up to 4x a week now!)
I also have a fabulous friend who has gotten over her breakup with her
boyfriend of 6 years in a spectacularly vulnerable yet brave, sassy and above all unique fashion. Instead of wallowing, she has wised up, seen him for who he
is, and is now lavishly spending her freed-up time and money on
fabulous food, activities, family and friends! I will miss the
zingingly-pink blog, but I'm glad for you =)
And last but not least in the very brief list of fabulousness, I have an independent friend who's so beyond-fabulous that she makes everyone around her look, and more
importantly, feel fabulous. Thanks for 10 years (and counting!) of
friendship and green melon-sandwich jokes ;)
My life is all-kinds-of-awesome-fabulous. Hurray for 2006!!!!
New Year's Resolutions
- Parcel out work, duties, assignments into smaller portions and work on them as soon as possible (i.e. DO NOT PROCRASTINATE!!!!)
- Read the Bible more.
- Be less hot-tempered.
- Be more patient.
- Be not double-standarded ;)
- Spend more time with my lovely doggies.
- Sleep 8 hours every day (this entails sleeping before 12)
- Exercise 4 times a week (hee!)
- Eat more vegetables and fruits
- Maintain a proper organizer instead of double-booking appointments constantly.
- Pick up lindy hop
- Take yoga classes
- Further refine excellent taste in music and food.
- Catch up with friends more often!
- Smile more =)
Paradise Lost
This article took my breath away like a punch in the stomach. Awful, awful, awful. How do you take the measure of a man? Carefully, and with a grrrreat deal of time. Yargh!
